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2020 Pied Piper by Stuart Ardern
Best Seller |
| Roles | Minimum Male roles = 1. Minimum Female roles = 4. Minimum total with doubling = 17. Minimum total without doubling = 28. Chorus. Some of the characters are written with a particular gender in mind, but that doesn't really matter. |
| Run Time | Around 20 minutes. [Estimated!] |
| Music | None. |
| Style | Not so much a rhyming pantomime as a raging satire. Minimal sets, few props. |
| Synopsis | There's a plague of rats about to fall on Hamelin, and the Mayor has gone on holiday. Even when he gets back, his trap and trace scheme is failing. Enter the Pied Piper with a scheme for which the mayor is more than happy to take credit, but not so eager to pay... |
| Price | For scripts and live performance rights, please click on the Price Link to find the cost. For scripts and lockdown videos/streaming rights, click here |
| Extras | The following additional items are available (at extra cost) to go with this script:
** Pantomime Fun-Packs - jokes and games for children, to supplement the programme for your show
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| Click here to read the script or Click here for more details. |
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| Aladdin by Stuart Ardern |
| Roles | Minimum Male roles = 7. Minimum Female roles = 5. Minimum total with doubling = 20. Minimum total without doubling = 31. Chorus. Dame assumed to be played by Male, Principal boy by Female. Lots of small speaking parts for chorus members. |
| Run Time | Around 120 minutes. [Estimated!] |
| Music | Lyrics and sheet music to six songs supplied with the Producer's Copy. Production Notes suggest additional songs. |
| Style | British Pantomime. Strong characters - dynamic hero, hissable villain, camp genie, henpecked emperor, etc. Packed with jokes, wordplay and sight gags. |
| Synopsis | Mayhem in China as the wicked Abanaza wields the magic lamp with its great and powerful genie, and captures the Emperor's daughter. Aladdin comes to the rescue, with the aid of Widow Twankey and the camp Genie of the Ring. |
| Price | For scripts and live performance rights, please click on the Price Link to find the cost. For scripts and lockdown videos/streaming rights, click here |
| Extras | The following additional items are available (at extra cost) to go with this script:
** A 'rehearsal CD' with piano arrangements of songs from the show
** Pantomime Fun-Packs - jokes and games for children, to supplement the programme for your show
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| Feedback | Click here to find out what other customers said about this script. |
| Click here to read the script or Click here for more details. |
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| Alderman Whittington's Cat by Stuart Ardern |
| Roles | Minimum Male roles = 0. Minimum Female roles = 0. Minimum total with doubling = 14. Minimum total without doubling = 26. No chorus. Some characters are written as male and some as female, but gender isn't important in casting. |
| Run Time | Around 24 minutes. [Estimated!] |
| Music | There are spaces for song and dance routines to be added into the script, at the producer's discretion. Lazy Bee Scripts does not supply any sheet music with this script. |
| Style | Pantomime in rhyming quadrameters (and a rap). No set required, but you might go to town on the props. |
| Synopsis | He went to London penniless
And found the town in a mess.
He solved the problems with such flair
He rose to be the city's mayor.
This is the story of his climb
Dick Whittington - a play in rhyme! |
| Price | For scripts and live performance rights, please click on the Price Link to find the cost. For scripts and lockdown videos/streaming rights, click here |
| Click here to read the script or Click here for more details. |
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| Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves by Stuart Ardern |
| Roles | Minimum Male roles = 2. Minimum Female roles = 3. Minimum total with doubling = 21. Minimum total without doubling = 30. Chorus. Comes with the opportunity for the usual pantomime gender juxtapositions. Includes a pantomime camel. There are four named thieves, and the author recommends another six to make up to forty, though it might be possible with fewer! |
| Run Time | Around 120 minutes. [Estimated!] |
| Music | Piano and vocal scores for 10 original songs and a dance are included with the Producer's Copy of the script. |
| Style | British pantomime with magic, spectacle, music, visual jokes, slapstick and verbal humour. |
| Synopsis | Ali Baba falls for the Sultan's daughter and determines to impress her by retrieving valuables stolen by a band of thieves. Unfortunately, the thieves have other ideas. Ali has Salma, the resourceful servant girl, a Genie, a camel with integral SatNav, and, of course, his mother to call on, but what he really needs is an audience to help him win through! |
| Price | For scripts and live performance rights, please click on the Price Link to find the cost. For scripts and lockdown videos/streaming rights, click here |
| Extras | The following additional items are available (at extra cost) to go with this script:
** A 'backing track CD' with arrangements of songs from the show
** Soundtrack CD - vocal performances of songs from the show
** Pantomime Fun-Packs - jokes and games for children, to supplement the programme for your show
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| Click here to read the script or Click here for more details. |
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| Another Cat, Another Hat by Stuart Ardern |
| Roles | Minimum Male roles = 3. Minimum Female roles = 3. Minimum total with doubling = 10. Minimum total without doubling = 12. No chorus. As presented on the web site, the script requires a minimum cast of 15, but the Producer's Copy provides a number of variations to the text which can reduce the cast size to 10 (with doubling).
It's panto so gender is flexible. |
| Run Time | Around 30 minutes. [Estimated!] (Variations cutting characters and dances would bring the time down to around 20 minutes.) |
| Music | The script has several places for songs and dances at the producer's discretion. The score for one song is provided (it's not essential, but it happens to fit.) |
| Style | One-act rhyming pantomime version of Puss in Boots, designed for minimal sets but requiring a few portable items. |
| Synopsis | The miller's son, to his distress
Is poor and can't court the princess
That's something which his cat disputes -
A talking cat, it's Puss in Boots! |
| Price | For scripts and live performance rights, please click on the Price Link to find the cost. For scripts and lockdown videos/streaming rights, click here |
| Extras | The following additional items are available (at extra cost) to go with this script:
** Backing tracks of songs from the show as MP3 files
** Pantomime Fun-Packs - jokes and games for children, to supplement the programme for your show
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| Click here to read the script or Click here for more details. |
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| Beauty and The Beast by Stuart Ardern |
| Roles | Minimum Male roles = 2. Minimum Female roles = 2. Minimum total with doubling = 17. Minimum total without doubling = 24. Chorus. The usual pantomime ambiguity - Belle and the witch are definitely female. The Beast and the Merchant definitely male. Mrs. Bustle could be female or male (a pantomime dame), the prince is probably a 'principal boy' (played by a girl). |
| Run Time | Around 120 minutes. [Estimated!] |
| Music | Sheet music for 11 original songs (counting two reprises) supplied with the Producer's Copy of the script. |
| Style | English pantomime - puns, slapstick, visual jokes, songs. (It should be stressed that this is pantomime and not the Disney version of the story!) |
| Synopsis | The arrogant prince is turned into The Beast by a scheming witch. He can only redeem himself if someone loves him for what he is. Into the Beast's castle comes a hapless merchant, father of the beautiful Belle. The merchant incurs the Beast's wrath, but when it is time for him to return to face justice from the Beast, Belle returns in his place. |
| Price | For scripts and live performance rights, please click on the Price Link to find the cost. For scripts and lockdown videos/streaming rights, click here |
| Extras | The following additional items are available (at extra cost) to go with this script:
** A 'rehearsal CD' with piano arrangements of songs from the show
** Pantomime Fun-Packs - jokes and games for children, to supplement the programme for your show
|
| Feedback | Click here to find out what other customers said about this script. |
| Click here to read the script or Click here for more details. |
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| Dick Whittington and His Cat by Stuart Ardern |
| Roles | Minimum Male roles = 6. Minimum Female roles = 3. Minimum total with doubling = 17. Minimum total without doubling = 22. Chorus. Dame assumed to be played by Male, Principal Boy by Female. Cast includes cat, rats, camel and a cameo appearance of a pantomime horse. |
| Run Time | Around 105 minutes. [Estimated!] |
| Music | Sheet music for 9 original songs supplied with the Producer's Copy of the script. |
| Style | British Pantomime. Strong characters, tons of jokes, puns, parody, and a dancing cat |
| Synopsis | Enlisting the help of a cat, a camel and an uncannily familiar bard, Dick Whittington battles rats and pirates, survives a shipwreck and an encounter with an unusual smuggler to win the hand of the Lord Mayor's daughter. |
| Price | For scripts and live performance rights, please click on the Price Link to find the cost. For scripts and lockdown videos/streaming rights, click here |
| Extras | The following additional items are available (at extra cost) to go with this script:
** Pantomime Fun-Packs - jokes and games for children, to supplement the programme for your show
|
| Feedback | Click here to find out what other customers said about this script. |
| Click here to read the script or Click here for more details. |
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Jack and the Beanstalk [A Deadpan Panto] by Stuart Ardern
Best Seller |
| Roles | Minimum Male roles = 0. Minimum Female roles = 2. Minimum total with doubling = 8. Minimum total without doubling = 8. No chorus. It's a pantomime. Make your own mind up as to who plays what. |
| Run Time | Around 5 minutes. [Estimated!] |
| Music | None. |
| Style | Originally written for an unrehearsed reading at a Christmas party, so no set, simple lines, minimal action (if any) and a good deal of silliness. |
| Synopsis | With the aid of his mother, their cow, a fairy and some magic beans, Jack Trott rescues a princess and a hen from a giant and thwarts the greedy landlord. |
| Price | For scripts and live performance rights, please click on the Price Link to find the cost. For scripts and lockdown videos/streaming rights, click here |
| Extras | The following additional items are available (at extra cost) to go with this script:
** Pantomime Fun-Packs - jokes and games for children, to supplement the programme for your show
|
| Click here to read the script or Click here for more details. |
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| The Panto of the Opera by Stuart Ardern |
| Roles | Minimum Male roles = 4. Minimum Female roles = 4. Minimum total with doubling = 15. Minimum total without doubling = 28. Chorus. The usual pantomime juxtapositions with a dame played by a man and the principal boy played by a girl. Also includes cameo appearances by Toulouse-Lautrec and a pantomime horse. |
| Run Time | Around 105 minutes. [Estimated!] |
| Music | Sheet music (piano and vocal) for 12 original songs is supplied with the producer's copy of the script. |
| Style | English pantomime - a fantastic tale (in this case based on the gothic horror story 'The Phantom of the Opera') told with songs, jokes, puns and slapstick. |
| Synopsis | Mysterious goings-on at the Paris Opera house - the new owner discovers that her premises are threatened with closure by villainous English Lord, Frank Lee, that she is under perpetual scrutiny from a Health and Safety inspector and that the Opera House is haunted by the mysterious Phantom, who seems to be giving singing lessons to Christine, a newcomer who has attracted the attention of the wealthy patron, Raoul. Not only that, but the owner is under siege from a stream of composers who want to pitch ideas for new shows to her (some of which might sound a little familiar) and, what's more, a gold statue has gone missing from the roof. Can Raoul save Christine from the Phantom? Can anyone save the Opera House from Frank? |
| Price | For scripts and live performance rights, please click on the Price Link to find the cost. For scripts and lockdown videos/streaming rights, click here |
| Extras | The following additional items are available (at extra cost) to go with this script:
** A 'backing track CD' with arrangements of songs from the show
** Pantomime Fun-Packs - jokes and games for children, to supplement the programme for your show
|
| Click here to read the script or Click here for more details. |
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| Puss in Boots (Full Cast) by Stuart Ardern |
| Roles | Minimum Male roles = 3. Minimum Female roles = 4. Minimum total with doubling = 13. Minimum total without doubling = 22. Chorus. Characters include an ogre, a talking cat and a pantomime donkey! Dame assumed to be played by Male, Principal Boy by Female. |
| Run Time | Around 105 minutes. [Estimated!] |
| Music | Sheet music to two songs and a set of simple fanfares supplied with the Producer's Copy of the script. Other songs suggested in the production notes. |
| Style | British Pantomime. Strong characters, packed with puns, sight gags, running jokes and slapstick. |
| Synopsis | Tom, the hero, is bequeathed a cat in his father's will. An unusual cat. A cat with the gift of the gab. A gift for getting Tom into trouble - and out of it again in his quest to marry a princess. |
| Price | For scripts and live performance rights, please click on the Price Link to find the cost. For scripts and lockdown videos/streaming rights, click here |
| Extras | The following additional items are available (at extra cost) to go with this script:
** Pantomime Fun-Packs - jokes and games for children, to supplement the programme for your show
|
| Feedback | Click here to find out what other customers said about this script. |
| Click here to read the script or Click here for more details. |
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